sometimes a rage rises
old and angry
from an inner tomb
unrequited
it bangs on the door
of my head
aching
to explode
its blast of hurt
denied
terrified - I clamp my teeth
resist the grief
and walk away
tired from the battle
to hold back
& stem this inner lava flow
I'll raise a cairn
of pure white stone
and deeply engrave it with
my finger's bone

Here lies the loss
of my sons
innocence

Taken by wealthy man
respected, well known
in the local land

Jail not enough
to quench this hot fermenting
stuff

I'll lay before it
white lillies of perfume strong
and bow my head
and write this poem
till all is emptied
out
enough
wet tears
a mothers worst fears

quench this inner glow

slowly returning to sanity
from the precipice of stress
heart skipping
short breathed
crest
of emotion
recedes
as the moment passes
and my son picks up the pieces of his heart

and mine can rest, at last

God bless him as he re-weaves torn self-esteem
and jumps back on the narrow walking beam

and finds a new path
matching his work closer to his heart

Well, last night was a kaleidoscope of dreams
weird, bazaar, unrelated, unimagineable -
what did I eat?

It's a long weekend but I've been working for my partner,
then for my son, interspersed with meals out as rewards,
and the cuddles of a grand-daughter

Weather still hot and trying to rain
Thought it was winter but been hot again.

Hear my other son has being threatenned by a bikie gang leader
All a bit surreal - like my dreams
hopefully no need to heed either!?

..and hope they're not related

stone gathers no ----
so what's not there's no loss?

another day, another ------
time to get over it
and holla

...for a marshall?
what can he do?
summon the forces
remove the ---
flat tyre

when all I want
to say is
I DO